Everything has just happened so fast. People, places, faces moving and changing so quickly. It gets so hard to keep up with. I wonder if everyone goes through this feeling at one point or another in life? The feeling of uncertainty and uneasiness, almost to the point of nausea. Where every decision feels as if its the most important one you've ever made. Who ever thought freedom could become such a burden? I'm just so bundled up with a million and one emotions. How unjust everything is. How ridiculously everything turns out for some and not for others. I must turn and look to a bright future, just keep on enjoying and moving forward to get where I want to be. I’m really looking forward to the summer, assuming everything turns out how i want it to. I need to just stay focused on school and work now. Getting into university and getting my life started. There has been so much time spent on silly things. I feel as if its time I just take control of my life and DO something with it. Just thinking about going to Osheaga is getting me through the days. For all of you who don’t know, Osheaga is a 3 day music festival in Montreal, QC. The lineup this year is so amazing its unbelievable. Florence and the Machine, The Shins, The Black Keys, Metric, Feist, City and Colour, MGMT, Freelance Whales and oh so many more. OH! And Snoop Dog! How could I forget Snoop! Just the thought of me being in the same place as all of them, in the heart of Montreal, with a group of my friends can pretty much get me through anything right now. I advise all my fellow music lovers to go check out the website and plan a trip. It’s going to be amazing! I must maintain a good balance of everything though to get things done. Clear my head and find the place I work best in. Make sure I keep up with all my studies. Get into my first choice university, UofOttawa. whoop whoop! Make money for my trip in the summer to Montreal. And still have enough down time to do Zumba or Pottery to keep myself level headed and grounded. The rewards for the hard work I put in now are just so hard to visualize in the future but I must keep working. Nothing can be for sure and there is no way of telling how many times I'm going to change my mind about what I want to do and what kind of life I want to live. The best anyone can do right now is just go day by day putting in as much effort as possible and giving themselves as many opportunities. Even if I never end up wanting to go to school, work, or take a completely different direction than what I chose now, I want to be able to decide it and not be limited. To give myself as many options as possible. I hope anyone and everyone else going through this knows they aren't alone! Enjoy yourself and do what makes you feel good. When I work hard I get the utmost satisfaction. Just keep believing and hoping everything will work out and before you know it you’ll be where you want to be. Set goals and aspirations, they help. Be brave and take a leap of faith with every hard decision you must make.
Stay loveeely!
